Sunday, October 31, 2010

beloved.

So, the last 11 weeks of my life have been spent doing many things... but the biggest of those has been ME discovering who I am... discovering that I am The Beloved. This is what it's been looking like:

there is nothing that I can do that make Him love me more
there is also nothing I can do to make Him love me less
He loves me.. because He loves me... because He loves me... because He loves me...
because THAT is what He is like. it is HIS NATURE to love. I will always be The Beloved.
He loves me 100% as I am right now in this moment.
He loves all the way, all the time.
His love never changes... but what does change is my ability to receive His love.
so He says, "open your heart. give Me whatever is holding you back right now, because I love you as you are right now."  just be loved.
i am The Beloved
it's my JOB to be loved outrageously
He has set His love upon me so that I would live as one that IS outrageously loved
bc that is who He is! this is the I AM that He promised to be.
He says, "just love Me back with the love I give to you"
"love Me back outrageously!"
"you can only love Me as much as you love yourself"
and that is what I've seen... I have been set into a whirlwind of freedom 
His love has set me free from how I see myself
His love has set me free from myself
from the smallness of my own thinking about who I am...
    rejected
        unimportant 
            ashamed 
                guilty
                    in despair 
                        lonely ...
when He looks at me...He sees something that He loves. He sees someone that He can and does love. He sees someone that He can love outrageously.
He says, "I see so much that I want to give you. I see so many places I want to take you, but you can't go there until you let Me love you."
His love for me is doing it... it's breaking down every barrier and bringing every wall crashing down. 
His love has DAMAGED the fear in my life.
His love fights fear.
His love fights the fear inside of me.
His love fights to fear around me. 
He told me, "you are My Beloved and in My love, I want you to feel good about yourself."
I do. I feel good about myself. I am The Beloved. I am beautiful. I have many gifts. I am needed and wanted. I bring God-encounters to everyone I meet. I am a woman of high honor and courage that fears God. I am a woman with a growing ability to receive His love... a woman that is learning more each day about His love for me... so that I can love others more... and love Him back the most. 
I am The Beloved